Extroverts vs. Introverts

A couple of weeks ago I took part in an informal mini-seminar based on the Myers-Briggs personality test with my son’s youth group. Some of the results surprised me, some of them not-so-much.

To start with we learned about whether we were introverts or extroverts. This was a no-brainer for me—I know I’m an introvert with a capital ‘I’. However, the definition we were given was a little different that I’d expected. An introvert is someone who ‘recharges’ and gets their energy from spending time alone, while an extrovert ‘recharges’ and gets their energy from spending time with people. And here’s me thinking that my definition of an extrovert—‘A flamboyant person who never stops talking, likes to be the center of attention, and will often interrupt people mid-sentence’—was correct. Turns out that not all extroverts are loud-mouths, and not all introverts are quiet people who hide in corners. Who knew?

As part of the mini-seminar, the extroverts were directed to one side of the room and the introverts to the other. No surprise to me that my husband defected to the extrovert side, while my 15 year old son and I escaped to the quiet, introvert side of the room. Interesting to watch the different group dynamics when we were given ten minutes to discuss the question, ‘What do you wish the other group would understand about you?’ While the extrovert side of the room buzzed with voices all talking at once, and getting louder and louder to be heard over the verbal ruckus, the introverts on my side of the room spoke one at a time, each letting the other finish their opinion before offering their own. I’m not saying either group was more successful at communicating, it was just interesting to see the majorly different styles—and for a writer? Pure gold.

So what did we introverts want the extroverts to know about us? (Because quite honestly, most in that group had no clue to how our minds work). We want to be heard, and we want the opportunity to think and then speak without other people interrupting and/or finishing our sentences for us. We’re not necessarily shy, or slow of thought, or fence-sitters when it comes to voicing an opinion. We just process differently. What did the extroverts want to know about the introverts? What are you thinking when you’re not talking to us? Don’t you find the silence awkward?

So, introvert vs. extrovert, who’s the winner? Quite often this seems to be the way society encourages us to behave. Both personality types are poked fun at in different sit-coms, both are often made out to be ‘better’ than the other, and I disagree. While I’m firmly in the introvert camp and know I’ll always be, many of my closest friends are extroverts and I wouldn’t change them for the world. Just like I hope they wouldn’t want me to change either.

I’ll go think on that. Alone.

Which are you, introvert or extrovert, and what would you like your opposite personality type to know?

Tracey

What I’m reading this week: Instant Gratification – Jill Shalvis. I ration myself on Jill Shalvis’s books, cuz I just love her work so much—and I know I’d never get any writing done if I allowed myself to read one book after the other.

What I’m watching this week: A new series on New Zealand screens, ‘Revolution’. Love the premise and the writers hooked me into the series from the get-go.

This week’s favorite quote: Introverts living under the Extroversion Ideal are like women in a man’s world, discounted because of a trait that goes to the core of who they are. Extroversion is an enormously appealing personality style, but we’ve turned it into an oppressive standard to which most of us feel we must conform. ― Susan Cain.

Hot guy of the week: Star of the new series ‘Revolution’, Billy Burke. Gotta love a guy with a guitar in his hands.